“I can’t lie, we’ve had a rough week. Sales are down, and the bartenders are complaining about being overstaffed. But, when a new restaurant like Madden’s Post conveniently located on the corner of Clark and Waveland opens, some excess labor can be expected.”
“When reached for comment, Bears GM Ryan Pace denied that the Bears had hired Grossman as a coach over the off-season, but admitted the QB has been living in the ventilation ducts of Solider Field since 2009.”
“It’s such an honor coaching for a team with such a storied history. Back in 1920, George Halas founded this team, and 65 years later they fielded the greatest collection of football players to ever take the field together.”
"We really don't know what he's doing here, or even what position he is supposed to be playing," said Mack. "It's just fun to see him strutting around as one of the guys. We're definitely going to miss him while he recovers."
“I don’t understand why we’re starting construction without plans to include a warning track,” said Cubs centerfielder Albert Almora Jr. “When I’m tracking a flyball across the American West and through the New Mexico desert, I don’t want to run into the wall at full speed.”